Saturday, October 24, 2009

The Call


Received a few calls from GA to help in coming events.
Accepted one, still considering the other one.
Guess I won't be helping the later one, since it's so long and stressful.
I need time for myself, need some space to think...

Tried to help in finding helpers,
but it turn out that I don't need to worry about it.
Waste of time and energy to ask here and there.

Just got the news that very soon I might be seeing someone I don't really wish to see.
Luckily is this one, not the other one...
I really don't know how to deal with that feeling of betrayal.
What's so good about that place?
What's the big deal of can't find any work here in Northern?

Yes! I don't understand!
Yes! I'm selfish by just thinking of myself!
What about you?
Do you seriously think that you are just moving your place of worship from here to there?
And do you actually think there is no difference of serving in different places?
Are they really just the same?
Please... You have no idea of what you had left behind...

You both said you know very well that Northern needs helpers and yet,
you are still leaving.
Leaving for YOUR own good!
I am just mad, mad at your unfulfilled promises.

By seeing this place is getting weaker and weaker,
I can't bare to leave just like you both.
I have my responsibility here,
to protect the place I grew up physically and spiritually.
Until the last day,
until the day I'm not needed anymore......

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